Due to increasing products liability litigation,
American liquor manufacturers have accepted the
FDA's suggestion that the following warning labels
be placed immediately on all varieties of alcohol
containers:
-~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~
WARNING: - The consumption of alcohol may leave you
wondering what the hell happened to your bra and
panties.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~
WARNING: - The consumption of alcohol may make you
think you are whispering when you are not.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~
WARNING: - The consumption of alcohol is a major
factor in dancing like a retard.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~
WARNING: - The consumption of alcohol may cause you
to tell your friends over and over again that you
love them.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~
WARNING: - The consumption of alcohol may cause you
to think you can sing.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~
WARNING: - The consumption of alcohol may lead you
to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you
to telephone them at four in the morning.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~
WARNING: - The consumption of alcohol may make you
think you can logically converse with members of the
opposite sex without spitting.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~
WARNING: - The consumption of alcohol may create the
illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and
better looking than most people.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~
WARNING: - The consumption of alcohol may lead you
to think people are laughing WITH you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~
WARNING: - The consumption of alcohol may cause
pregnancy.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~
WARNING: - The consumption of alcohol may be a major
factor in getting your ass kicked.
coooooollll
<3annamack
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